


Another Kind of Love

by ManaBanana



Category: Naruto
Genre: First Dates, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-12-07 04:12:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18229742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ManaBanana/pseuds/ManaBanana
Summary: Gaara opens himself up to the people closest to him--Naruto and Rock Lee.He doesn't realize he's in love until it's too late.





	Another Kind of Love

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, what is this? I don't know!
> 
> This is barely edited, but I really wanted to toss this idea out there.
> 
> I also didn't tag this as NaruGaa because I didn't wanna seem like I was stomping over the ship in favor of GaaLee *shrug*
> 
> Anyway, have fun reading!

The concept of love didn't come naturally to Gaara. But after his fights with Rock Lee and Naruto, he was able to understand that love was meant to be shared. Although he vowed to live for and love only himself, seeing two other boys like him grow up to be so full of love and affection set everything in stone.

He could love others, too. He just needed to try.

After his abduction from the Akatsuki, Rock Lee and Naruto were there when Gaara was revived. The feeling of Naruto's hand on his shoulder branded itself in Gaara's skin. Naruto saved Gaara from himself. Not once. But twice. He was there for Gaara when it seemed like no one else was. He wanted to return the favor, but it seemed impossible to save the life of someone whose spirit refused to die. 

So, Gaara decided to open himself up, deeming it safe to extend love to another person.

A handshake became a brief smile and several months passed before he saw Naruto again. Gaara wanted to show Naruto that he loved him. So he sent letters. And Naruto sent them back. He spent so many months reading books, watching couples from afar, overseeing weddings, researching courtship practices… With each passing day, he analyzed each letter further, driving himself down a path that spiraled his overactive mind into an endless, hypersensitive frenzy. Failing to find a concrete answer regarding Naruto's feelings, Gaara found himself living in a never-ending state of agitation that didn't go unnoticed by his siblings or the Suna council.

The next time Naruto visited, Gaara decided to be direct. He brought Naruto to his personal greenhouse where he tended to his cacti and they shared stories about days long past. He found himself staring into the deep, ocean blue of Naruto's eyes, took a deep breath, and whispered a barely audible “I love you.” 

He was met with a raspy laugh and an “I love you, too, man,” before Naruto went on another rant about Sasuke. Gaara could feel the crease form between his eyes. Naruto wasn't getting it. Had all of his research failed him? Where was the catharsis? That emotional release that came with the confession of love? All that time spent following the rules and pouring his heart out… it didn't exist. 

Unbeknownst to Naruto, Gaara spent months practicing his confession. Dreaming of how it would go. Forcing his mouth to form the consonants behind a sincere “I love you” until he actually believed it was true. He felt his heart slamming so hard in his chest as the words came out that he could barely hear himself say it. 

And then Naruto laughed. He said it back. But he laughed. And that broke Gaara's heart. This wasn't the heartfelt confession Gaara dreamed of. No, to Naruto it was a joke. Something he could brush off and say back without a second thought.

So he tried it again, rephrasing the sentiment this time to ensure the words would pierce through Naruto's thick skull and somehow burrow their way into his heart.

“I'm in love with you.”

But Naruto's face faltered.

“I didn't mean it like that.”

Like what? What other way could there possibly be? He loved Naruto, there wasn't much else he could say. In Gaara's mind, love merely existed in absolutes. He either loved someone, or he didn't.

He didn't understand how someone could say they loved another person back if they didn't really mean it. It made him feel like a kid again. It reminded him of the pain he felt learning his uncle never meant it when he said he loved Gaara.

Naruto left him alone that night to cry in his office amongst a pile of books about love, tarnished and torn by his sand. He lied there for hours, encased in a sand cocoon, refusing to speak to his siblings who were only trying to help.

From then on, Gaara swore off love.

He went along with his routine, filing paperwork, and emotionally closing himself off to the people around him. His stiff manner and need to keep everyone at an arm's length became somewhat of a cultural norm amongst the villagers of Suna. No one felt they could connect with him. Gaara earned the respect of his village, but if he happened to make eye contact with with someone in the city streets, he noticed them immediately avert their gaze.

Sometimes that hurt worse.

One too-early morning, Gaara noticed a familiar green blur stop by his office to drop off a mission report from Konoha. He glanced up from his desk, tired eyes meeting round, determined ones that could only belong to Rock Lee. The fastest taijutsu specialist Konoha--and perhaps the world--had ever seen. Gaara offered him a rare, brief smile and felt their fingertips graze as he took the report. He brushed off the pink tinge that spread across Lee's cheeks, likely a flush that came from running so fast.

Lee stood for a moment too long at Gaara's desk, internally mulling something over. He cleared his throat and bowed so low he nearly knocked his head against the lacquered wood.

“Kazekage-sama, it has been far too long since we last met. Please allow me to take you out for a nice dinner tonight.”

So he did.

The night carried on far longer than the two anticipated. They walked through the empty city streets of Suna a little too close together. When Gaara found himself listening to one of Lee's crazy stories about his missions, he felt something seize his body until he realized he was laughing. It had been so long since he allowed himself to feel genuine happiness that he hardly remembered the sound. When Gaara looked up, Lee was laughing back softly, a fond look in his eyes.

He took Lee back to his guest apartment that night and was met with a strong, meaningful hug at the entryway. Gaara allowed himself to bury closer into Lee's warmth against the cold desert air. And as Gaara agreed to let Lee take him out again, Lee leaned close to Gaara's face and pressed his lips to the soft skin of his cheek.

By the time Gaara got back to his room, he felt a warm, fluttering sensation across his chest and touched his cheek where Lee had kissed him.

Three months later, Gaara was back to sending letters.

He exchanged letters almost daily with Lee, whose flowery, poetic language softened his exterior, peeling away the sand armor that guarded his heart. Gaara went to meetings with a new determination. The first time he cracked a joke with the council, it caught them off-guard, but he felt his chest fill up when the room clamored, breaking out into an uproarious laughter. He was approachable again. The citizens would now wave if they saw him walking down the street. Gaara allowed his siblings to hug him and tease him… He felt like a good person again.

Later that night, Gaara opened up another letter from Lee. He was planning on coming to Suna within the month for personal visitation, and Gaara found himself holding the letter close to his chest. He had sworn off love for so long now, he didn't realize it was creeping back into his life. He stopped in his tracks and the letter fluttered to the ground as the realization dawned on him.

He loved Lee. But he wasn't ready to be rejected again. He felt his now-exposed heart cracking at the thought.

Gaara's hands shook as he returned to his room, lying on the sheets of a hardly-used bed while thoughts of Lee raced past his mind. He wasn't ready. 

So he opted not to tell him. His love would manifest in the shadows and Lee would never have to know. They would be friends and it would hurt… but Gaara would survive. He'd been through worse.

Days became weeks and before he knew it, Gaara found himself at the entrance of his village to greet Lee--not as a friend, or a man in love, but as the Kazekage--he was swept off his feet into a bone-crushing embrace. Though it alarmed the guards nearby, Gaara knew Lee meant no harm. He was just excited to see Gaara.

His friend.

Lee was escorted to his guest apartment and met Gaara in his office only a few hours later.

“Kaze--ah, Gaara… I was hoping to take you out again tonight like we did the last time I was here? It has been some time.”

Gaara found himself smiling so hard, he barely registered that he had already said yes.

So they had another nice dinner and Gaara felt himself laughing again in Lee's company. Lee gifted him a tiny cactus he had bought back in Konoha, knowing it would do well to flourish in the desert under Gaara's care. Gaara smiled softly, but he couldn't fight the voice in the back of his head that told him Lee didn't love him. He pushed it back, far into the depths of his mind where Shukaku now resided.

It could wait.

Gaara invited Lee to come with him to re-pot the new cactus in his greenhouse. Lee told him stories about Konoha as he worked and couldn't help but feel his heart sink when Lee mentioned Naruto. 

Suddenly Gaara was aware of the direct parallel from when he confessed to Naruto. He nearly dropped the terra cotta pot he held in his hands.

Gaara pushed the thoughts to the back of his mind and tried to steady his breathing as Lee talked to him. But his mind wandered in and out of the story. He couldn't handle more rejection.

On the walk back to Lee's apartment, he abruptly turned to face Gaara and his thick, black eyebrows furrowed, an odd expression in his eyes.

“Gaara… I have wanted to get this off my chest for some time now, but wanted to wait until I could meet you face to face.”

Gaara felt like he was staring into Lee's soul. He nodded for him to continue.

“I know this may be weird or uncomfortable for you to hear and I understand if the sentiment is not returned, but…”

His fists clenched at his sides and Gaara waited with bated breath.

“Gaara, I think I am in love with you.”

The wind subsided for a moment as the silence grew between them.

“I would love if you would do me the honor of being my boyfriend.”

Gaara hardly knew what to do… what to say… He only felt his feet move forward as he flung himself into Lee's arms and whispered “I will” into his neck. Lee held him back as happy tears cascaded down his cheeks.

And then he asked Gaara if he could kiss him.

A day became a week became a month until a full year passed with Rock Lee. Their relationship was maintained long-distance across the Konoha-Suna border, but the two loved each other too strongly for it to be a problem. It made their reunions that much sweeter. But their relationship took the people of Suna some getting used to. When Lee came to visit, they saw Gaara smile more often than they ever had. He let himself be hugged and softly kissed as his new boyfriend brought him gifts to honor their leader, cherishing him with all the love in his heart. And it really made them believe that their Kazekage was human--he had emotions and wants and needs that were fulfilled by his blossoming relationship with Rock Lee.

Lee came to the Kazekage manor on the night of their first anniversary. He was done up in his formal attire and took Gaara on an outing to celebrate. They went to the restaurant where Lee first took him out, he bought him a new aloe, and they tended to the cacti in Gaara's greenhouse while Lee read aloud the letters he had saved over the years. They held each other in the greenhouse and lost each other in soft kisses throughout the night.

But Gaara was finding it harder and harder to quiet the voice in the back of his mind.

_Temari said this is just the honeymoon phase. He doesn't love you that much. This won't last. He'll find someone else. You don't deserve this._

He couldn't tell Lee. He just waited until Lee inevitably got sick of him and decided to end their relationship.

But for their two-year anniversary, Gaara happened to be in Konoha for a Kage meeting, where he met Lee at his apartment afterward. They spent the night cooking together and laughing over old stories from their youth. Lee gifted Gaara a tiny succulent to plant when he returned to the desert. They fell asleep in Lee's bed, arms wrapped around each other, their steady breathing lulling the other to sleep.

_How could someone love you that much?_

Lee's anniversary gifts became more extravagant and he visited Suna as often as he could, surprising Gaara more and more with the strength of his love.

One warm night after their fourth anniversary, they wandered through the city streets in a comfortable silence with their fingers laced together. Gaara leaned farther into Lee's space. He brought Lee's bandaged hand up to his lips and pressed soft kisses across his knuckles.

After awhile, Gaara realized Lee had been uncharacteristically quiet. He wondered perhaps if the kisses were too much until he glanced toward the ground and saw a wet droplet fall into the sand by their feet. The skies were clear and the desert hadn't seen rain in several months. Gaara considered asking Lee about this unusual weather until he met dark eyes that were wet with tears. Gaara gasped softly and went to console him, releasing their hands and reaching for Lee's cheeks to wipe the tears away.

“Lee, what's wrong?”

_This is it. He's going to break up with you._

Lee smiled through the tears and laughed. He pressed a kiss to Gaara's soft lips and hugged him tight.

“I'm sorry, I was just thinking about how much I love you and I got overwhelmed,” he said, adjusting himself to rest his chin on Gaara's shoulder. “Do you want to stop at the plant shop? I'll buy you something. Because I love you.”

Gaara squeezed him tighter and was quick to join Lee in the tear-filled realization. He nodded into Lee's neck and spoke softly.

“I love you, too.”

They went to the plant shop hand in hand with tear-stained cheeks, laughing deliriously over how much they loved each other. Lee bought him yet another plant that they brought back to Gaara's home.

That night, Gaara apologized to Lee while they cuddled in bed. He apologized for the things he couldn't say out loud. For thinking Lee would ever stop loving him when he had so much love to give. For letting his anxieties and fears get in the way of their relationship.

But sweet, loving Lee didn't let that hold him back. He just said he loved Gaara.

“I love you as a friend. A shinobi. My boyfriend--”

“But that's just love.” Gaara didn't understand.

Lee laughed softly and kissed his hair. “But you can still love someone without being in a relationship. You love me, you love your siblings, you love your village, you love Naruto.”

Gaara felt his heart sink. It had been years since his confession, but the thought of loving Naruto still hurt him a little.

“But that's not… love, right?”

“Of course it is! But they are all different kinds of love!”

Gaara pondered that for awhile. Maybe that's what Naruto meant. He did love Gaara, but as a friend. A fellow Jinchuuriki. And eventually a Kage. Maybe Gaara’s inability to separate those types of love got in the way. Maybe he did love Naruto, but he was never _in love_ with him.

That wasn't the case with Lee. He loved Lee. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with him. Wake up to his face every morning. Come from work into a home he shared with Lee. Possibly develop a family together.

“Then I love you. As a friend. As a shinobi. As a taijutsu specialist. As my boyfriend. And hopefully someday… as my husband.”

Lee's breathing hitched.

“Really?”

Gaara turned in Lee's arms to face him. “If you'll have me.”

His eyes welled up with tears and he kissed Gaara over and over, until it seemed he forgot how. 

Gaara still struggled to open himself up to others, but with the fountain of overflowing love that was Rock Lee, he knew that he would at least have help figuring it out along the way.


End file.
